Texts From Last Night · soulero's Favorites

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soulero's Favorites Texts:

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(805): View more from California

Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.

Fav 3 1943 841
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(808): View more from Hawaii

My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.

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(636): View more from Missouri

He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.

(314): View more from Missouri

That was the greatest thing i have ever read.

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(214): View more from Texas

Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.

(303): View more from Colorado

Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.

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(214): View more from Texas

Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

Fav 179 88552 4084
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(206): View more from Washington

Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.

Fav 7 1153 1679
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