whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
