if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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