fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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