You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
You're so nebulous sometimes
I'm really into asian looking animals
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm lost and stupid without you.
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
