Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
youre lurking in front of me
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
