dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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