would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
