I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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