There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
