My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
