I'd wear matching sweaters with you
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
