doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
