Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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