She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
