I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
