his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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