I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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