I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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