There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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