If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
