I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Life is so much better after having sex.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
