I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
