pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I feel like death gave me a hand job
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
