Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
