We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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