it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
smell my finger.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
