i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Randomize
