imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
