i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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