I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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