He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize