I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
