i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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