my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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