waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
