They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
