Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
She made me pour olive oil on her.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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