i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
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