I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
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