i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
