do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
