dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
