I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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