I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
