I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize
