Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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