I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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