I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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