I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
My vagina is officially offended.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
